Parenting, from the ancient periods, is the shared responsibility between father and mother. Fatherly protection and motherly love is that sung lullaby to children till recent times. But today many children are fated to live with just one parent as the number of single parents is rising in number, especially in western countries. Single parent is a male of female person who is living alone with own or adopted child. Inconsistent families and live in relationships have emerged this new way of parenting which is being debated over and again for its effectiveness, struggles and influential capabilities on children. Research say that single parenting is not a defective mode of parenting, but practiced well, single parenting can be as good of dual parents. In typical parenting the parenting stress is shared equally among the father and mother, but a single parent has to balance all these struggles and make the sole element in the grooming and growth of children.
Stress, overload and adjustments
Single parenting is a stressful task. When a single person has to look after the kids as well his/her own job and responsibilities, the life may become stressful. Single parents may feel overloaded with obligations and they need to learn the effective time management skills and tension releasing techniques. Single parents need to realize that they are the sole person to look after the multi-faced growth of children. Children living single parents may become more adamant. Single parenting is not an unnatural way of living or parenting, but kids may feel slightly against the social norms as majority of kids live with both the parents. A single parent needs to adjust with the various needs of kids as their child or kids have only one person to depend on and rely upon.
Taking the responsibility
In single parenting a single person has to decide over the life kids as well as him/her. This is added responsibility and obligation. No one, in single parenting, shares the responsibility. Being the boss and guiding the kids in the right path is a struggle-some responsibility. A single parent needs to be firm and establish clear rules and boundaries for him/her and the children to follow. Being too much lenient is destructive and children may take everything for granted in future.
Being strict doesn't mean being arrogant to kids. It just means being firm in principles and strong in disciplining methods. The added responsibility is to be maintained by enforcing creative and effective disciplinary measures at the home. Implicating the responsibility is not through methods of forceful execution, but by loving pruning.
Importance of being stable in relationship
A single parent should be stable in relationship with the children. A person, who feels the single parenting as a burden, may not succeed in it as parenting is a routine which is to be approached with passion and dedication. The one and only goal a person should have in parenting is the overall growth of the children. With this aim, a parent should try to maintain very stable relationship with children. Kids should feel the motherly care and fatherly protection from the single parent. Single parents falling in relationship with another person is acceptable, but kids should never feel ignored as a result of parent finding another partner or relationship.
Mutual understanding is the key
Mutual understanding is the key to success in single parenting. Kids are to be trained to understand the essence of single parenting and help the parent to cop up with the struggles of it. Similarly, parent should realize the struggles of children who lack the support of one of the. It is quite difficult for kids to come into the realization that he/she has just one person to be called a parent while many others enjoy the love, care and support of both the parents. Mutual understanding helps both the parent and children to live efficiently and to extract the benefits of the single parenting lifestyle.
Teach kids to take part in the homely duties and also be self efficient in most of their own needs. In the same way, though single, the parent can perform the duties of both father and mother and help kids not to have a missing feeling. Having realistic expectation, mutually, is essential for success in life. The parent should understand the children, exactly as they are and help children to develop a realistic perception of life. This way the parenting can be a jovial excitement for the single parent.