Famous quotes know for their humour. Quotes that can make you laugh and think at the same time.

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.

~ Jack Handey

    When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.

    ~ Gracie Allen

      Confound these ancestors... They've stolen our best ideas!

      ~ Ben Jonson

        Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?

        ~ George Carlin

          I can resist everything except temptation.

          ~ Oscar Wilde

            What the world needs is more geniuses with humility; there are so few of us left.

            ~ Oscar Levant

              By all means marry. If you get a good wife you will become happy, and if you get a bad one you will become a philosopher.

              ~ Socrates

                It is impossible to travel faster than light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off.

                ~ Woody Allen

                  I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

                  ~ Joan Rivers

                    A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's. She changes it more often.

                    ~ Oliver Herford

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